I'm dog/studio sitting for a friend for a week on Sante Fe Arts District here in Denver.
What a treat; a big empty studio space, me and paints and books, with a loving little friend to throw a ball for and walk with a few times a day.
Makes me wonder why I can't get this much done at home -- why I don't buckle down in my studio and work consistently. It seems like the distractions (dishes, laundry, garden) aren't really the culprit.
It's more that there is more room for self doubt when I am in my routine; that the usual and the mundane actually make me think I can't make good art. The old me is the me that wins that mind game. I love keeping the house, watering the garden, walking my dog. But the familiar routine snaps me to the self that doubts myself as a creative person, the self I am working to grow out of.
It doesn't happen as much here in this new space. New space = new thoughts.
I need to start training my brain to remember this positive outlook, and believe in myself. I am going to work on keeping these patterns when I am back home.
Another treat about being here is reading time. I am in the middle of an awesome book called Wild Earth, Wild Soul by Bill Pfeiffer -- it's about setting up workshops and communities based on living in reconnection to Earth in community.
It is inspiring me to join in a little more. Gathered together, we can make a difference. The media world wants us alone and separate in out little cubicles so we think consumption give us fulfillment. We know it doesn't, and I know joining in would help me also to remember that more.
I am going to try to remember that a week away alone can reawaken the essential self -- we all deserve time to remember.
and some doodles in my journal so far:
"I told my students that to become intimate with the outer landscape it is important to become intimate with the inner landscape. The two are not separate. The inner landscape is as vast, deep, and wild as the outer landscape."